Before becoming a mama, productivity was my thing. I felt good at the end of the day when everything was done. The list? Ticked off. The house? Clean. Meals prepped and future-proofed. I had structure, routine, and a rhythm that made me feel accomplished. Being organised wasn’t just a habit—it was my measure of success. But here’s the truth about how motherhood changes your goals: it doesn’t ask for permission. It just does. My to-do list now grows daily. Routines change constantly. And finishing everything? A distant dream. Now, a single task ticked off—like feeding my toddler or folding half the laundry—can feel like a win. I still write lists (and still get overwhelmed by them), but I try to meet myself with kindness. If my toddler is fed and had a good day, that’s what success looks like now.
As a teacher, I used to view routines as the backbone of a successful day—predictable rhythms that support emotional regulation. But parenting taught me that home routines, unlike classroom ones, have to bend and flex more than I ever imagined.
Letting Go of Perfection and Finding My Why
I used to set big blogging goals—consistent posts, growing traffic, planning content, building a following. But when sleep deprivation took over and I was deep in the fog of survival mode, I had to pause. I didn’t have the energy, let alone the clarity, to write. And even though I missed it, I didn’t see how to make space for it. Until I realised that blogging wasn’t just a task on my list—it was me time. Creative time. Reflective time. That’s when I saw clearly how motherhood changes your goals. It’s no longer about perfection or performance. It’s about purpose. I still dream big for my blog, but now I write for me first. My goal is no longer to hit a number—it’s to reconnect. To pour my heart out and share the messy, beautiful truth. Because that truth? It’s needed.
And just like I encourage children to engage in open-ended creative play—where the process matters more than the product—I’ve had to allow myself that same freedom in blogging.
When Dreams Don’t Go as Planned
One of the hardest parts for me has been how motherhood collided with my identity as an early childhood educator. I looked forward to setting up learning spaces, planning play invitations, and bringing all my experience into our home. But the reality? My toddler often isn’t interested. And the time? It slips away. I see others creating these Pinterest-worthy setups and feel like I’m falling behind. And because this was my profession, it stings. That feeling of not measuring up? It took time to work through. I had to rebuild confidence as a mama and stop holding myself to an impossible standard. I had to give myself grace. And I realised that goals can change shape without losing meaning. My blog is still my dream—it’s just evolved. There’s more heart in it now. And more purpose.
In my teaching, I’ve always believed in following the child’s lead—and yet, I had to re-learn this lesson at home. It wasn’t about what I set up, but whether it connected with where my toddler was developmentally, emotionally, or even just that day.
How Motherhood Changes Your Goals Around Ambition
These days, ambition looks different. It’s not about external wins. It’s about internal peace. Creating a calm home. Supporting my overstimulated toddler. Having a bath without turning it into a splash war. (Okay, sometimes that still happens.) I’ve started to see my child’s needs through the lens of co-regulation, something I used to teach about all the time. The Circle of Security reminds us to be bigger, stronger, wiser, and kind—and that’s become a daily reminder during the toughest moments. My me time has changed too. As an introvert, I used to recharge in the evenings and catch up with friends on weekends. Now, I protect my energy fiercely. No more polite yeses. My time is rare, and when I get it, I choose things that fill my cup—like writing with a cup of tea in hand. If you’re craving more of that kind of me-time—the kind that reconnects you to who you are and who you want to become—my free guide From Dreaming to Doing | How to Start Becoming Your Dream Future Self is for you. It’s a simple but powerful resource for busy mamas ready to take that first small step toward something that’s theirs.
The Quiet Goals That Matter Most
These days, the goals I hold closest aren’t flashy. They’re the quiet wins. Like the moment my toddler had a bath without a meltdown because I finally figured out the post-kindy rhythm he needed. Or a bedtime that didn’t turn into a battle. These small shifts mean the world right now—and they remind me that how motherhood changes your goals is something to be proud of, not ashamed of. I’ve stopped comparing myself to the ‘old me’ or to others who seem to have it all together. I’m learning to make my own rules and commit, even if they don’t look like anyone else’s. Motherhood doesn’t mean the end of dreams—it just means they take new shapes. And that dream future self? She’s still there. She’s just softer now, more rooted in meaning and less in metrics. I’ve had to reframe what “learning” looks like—not just for my child, but for me. Just like Vygotsky’s Zone of Proximal Development teaches, growth happens in the in-between—where things feel a little uncomfortable but still possible with support. That’s exactly where motherhood has placed me.
This Is Still Growth
So if you’re in a season where everything feels different and you barely recognise your own goals—know this: how motherhood changes your goals doesn’t mean you’ve lost your spark. It means you’re transforming. You’re learning how to motivate yourself, even in the midst of chaos. You’re creating a life that aligns with who you are now. And maybe this is Bronfenbrenner’s theory at play—the idea that change begins in the immediate setting of home. When we focus inward, when we nurture our microsystem, we spark ripple effects that shape our whole world.
You’re still growing. Still dreaming. Still becoming.
And if you need a little help coming back to yourself, I’ve shared my evening reset for overwhelmed mums and how I gently reset after a chaotic week—no full Sunday prep required. Because sometimes, a reset starts with one small win. And sometimes, the most meaningful dreams are the ones we never planned for.
If this post spoke to you, I’d love to stay connected. The journey through motherhood can feel like a beautiful mess of shifting goals, tender wins, and unexpected growth—and you don’t have to navigate it alone. My newsletter is like a quiet chat over tea, filled with honest reflections, gentle encouragement, and simple ways to reclaim your spark—one meaningful moment at a time. Whether you’re dreaming big or just trying to make it through the day with your head held high, there’s space for you here. Come join the TEA-m—we’re in this together.
Motherhood didn’t make me lose myself—it simply taught me to dream differently, grow quietly, and find purpose in the smallest moments.
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